01-06

01-06 – 1:00pm

I fell asleep last night listening to Ferry Corsten, and I realized that I pretty much have no idea what I’m doing when it comes to composing, which I have been attempting since being here. I simply don’t have the tools or know how to accomplish what I’ve set out to do. That’s not to say I’m going to give up, it's just that with the equipment I have right now, i.e. my laptop and willpower, I just don’t think I can really compose something which is in any way comparable to the works of professional artists. It would require a significant investment on my part, something which is still impossible, and a lot lot lot of time learning and getting accustomed to the way things work.
But, on the other hand, I am going to sit down and really have a close listen to the songs I like and pick apart what aspects of them make them so significant to me. Hopefully then I can start to work off those ideas. Layers. Greg keeps mentioning layers, and boy do I know it’s the truth. I need more layers, and motion within them. Damnit I’m gonna write some good music. I’m listening to the stuff I’ve written already and I can already pick apart just from last night’s listening where I can improve and add movement. It’s weird to be so inspired and equally frustrated at the same time.

10:06pm

Worked in Matsudo today. Had a good time, honestly. There were no Titled Instructors there today, so it was all fun and games. It’s weird the way people do what they’re supposed to even when there’s no one there to make sure it’s done properly. Anyway, Natasha did a very sweet thing for me today. She asked if I needed anything from the convenience store, and when I told her I couldn’t afford it, she asked again anyway, and bought me a sandwich. It was really nice of her, and it was something of an interesting contrast to her generally catty attitude, which Bryan seems to clash with a bit. He doesn’t seem to be the biggest fan of her, but, I like bitchy girls. I like them a lot honestly. And it’s not that she’s bitchy, she’s just not coy. He claims she’s something of a high horse Christian type, which I have yet to see, but it was certainly nice of her to buy me a sandwich and I mean to return the favor.
Classes today were fun, I taught a class on music preferences and my students had a blast, I got to make sound effects the whole time and they just sat around and talked. I actually kinda forgot to follow the LMP for most of the lesson, I just kinda had to arbitrarily decide that we were at a point to move on, and I think I would have just said screw it entirely to the LMP but I figured I at least out to try to hold to some semblance of a normal lesson. Its was really nice to have such a musically eclectic group too. Voice was fun, etc etc etc.
Worked with Barbara today, and that was fun. She’s entertaining in her own way. I think it’s just that she tries to be intriguing and I kinda trump her. She talks to me the way someone does when they want to seem…interested, in a disinterested kinda, picking on you way. It’s cute how much I see through it. But all in all she’s a really sweet girl. I have to agree with Bryan though, “The Tooth” is something of a distraction. One of her incisors is dead, and so it’s discolored. And it’s been whitened, except that dead teeth are more porous so it’s whiter than the rest of her teeth now. *twitch* neurotic standards clicking on. It’s safe here in my little world, leave me alone.